Bittersweet

Although it has been a long time since I have updated, my reasoning is due to the fact that no new information on my mission trip has come up. I also don't have a laptop right now, so it is hard for me to continue updating. If it wasn't for my sister being here for a week, I wouldn't have been able to update today. I also have had mixed emotions about writing a blog.

The last time I updated, I explained what this blog was about and how it will be an outlet to describe my year-long duty. I feel as if this blog is about my experience about my impending mission trip to Panama. However, today was the day I really felt that my experience about my upcoming journey was taking its toll. Today was my first day back to work and it will be my last Tuesday. This Thursday will be my last day of working at my first job for three years. I remember when I walked through the classroom doors, I saw the children and I felt God's hand on me knowing that he will get me through this. Fast forward to three years later, and my children that I had seen that first time will now be the last time that I get to see them. I was fortunate enough to work for Good Samaritan Center, and I knew that the children (that have now blossomed into teenagers) understand that I won't come back for the summer, and it hurts me because I felt as if they were my own children.

This was the first experience that I had that really made my mission trip real. It was the fact that I found a place in my heart for the children, as well as them finding a place for me. It was the fact that I know that my calling was to show children that there is more to life then just wanting to play video games all the time and see that there are individuals that can do great things. I can truly say that my heart will never be the same when I don't see my children for a whole year.

I also wanted to say thanks to everyone who has been part of my journey. I have about $6,500 raised today. This is specially thanks to the Diocese of West Texas and my family at Trinity Episcopal Church. I also want to thank individuals that have been part of my journey as well.

This is a bittersweet day and a sound off to what I know will come to be an incredible journey in a couple of months. I hope by June 16th, I will get a laptop back. I anticipate that the more frequently I update, the more I will know that my next day will be full of joy and excitement.